Is This What Love Is?

 Is this what love is

I fall for another

But when I close my eyes

I still see you,

And your bright smile.

Taunting me of dreams

I've let go for a long time.

Is this what love is

I look at your pictures 

And call you ugly

But I smile, my heart smiles.

Because I see your bright eyes

Taunting me of dreams

I've taught myself to forget.

Is this what love is

I say I'm just fond of you

That I've given up.

But I see the sadness in your eyes

And the tears in your smiles.

Making me remember

Why we're the half of each other.

Is this what love is

I push thoughts of you

By loving another

But my heart clench

When I see a remembrance of you

Making me remember

Why we're the half of each other.

Is this how much I love you

That even when we don't talk

Even when we don't see each other

I remember the feel of your hands

The tears, kisses, and long goodbye

Taunting me of dreams

I don't want to remember.

Is this how much I love you

That when I hear the echo of your voice

See a shadow of your smile,

The subtle crinkling of your eyes,

Your confident stance reflected in another

My bruised heart still waits

For you to choose me this time.

-RM

2021.05.07

Wisdom: It’s a choice

“My son, if you accept my words and store up my commands within you, turning your ear to wisdom and applying your heart to understanding, and if you call out for insight and cry aloud for understanding, and if you look for it as for silver and search for it as for hidden treasure, then you will understand the fear of the Lord and find the knowledge of God.” Proverbs 2: 1-5 NIV

“Then you will understand what is right and just and fair –every good path. For wisdom will enter your heart, and knowledge will be pleasant to your soul. Discretion will protect you and understanding will guard you. Wisdom will save you from the ways of wicked men, from men whose words are perverse, who leave the straight paths to walk in dark ways. Who delight in doing wrong and rejoice in the perverseness of evil, and whose paths are crooked and who are devious in their ways.” Proverbs 2: 9-15 NIV

Years ago, I badly wanted to go into business. I was obsessed with ears and wrist accessories by then and it was the current rage so I thought that since I’m creative (Everybody says so, and I’d let it go to my head, shame on me!) I went with my friend to buy raw stuffs like beads, strings and locks. You won’t believe how much those things cost! My cash was down to half after hours of risking blisters on our feet just to find the materials we needed. So, there we were, pretty cocky that we got good prices and now have our “business” materials, only we forgot one essential thing. We had no business plan.

I was reminded of this “leap-before-you-think” attitude when I started re-reading the book of Proverbs. It opened with a father giving words of wisdom to his son and then reverted into a personification of wisdom as a woman on the streets calling out to people to hear what she had to say and no one bothered to. Sadly, it immediately reminded me how our generation today reacts like that. We couldn’t be bothered. We’re so intent on doing “our” thing—the Dream—that we forget to stop and listen to Wisdom. Not just anybody’s wisdom, but God’s.

Then by Chapter 2, it was once again the father speaking and he was now listing down the benefits of wisdom if only the son will accept it. Would he? The father was not sure. There was that conspicuous word “if.” Nonetheless, he went out to list down all the benefits of wisdom if the son would choose to have it.